Who watches the watchmen?

From 2007 to 2013, I was a programmer at a Dutch startup — Hyves. It was an amazing experience, and one that, for me at least, no employer has been able to match. That’s not to speak ill of my other employers of course, but if we recount the successes at Hyves, it’s easy to see why I have such great memories of the place.

We were the largest social network in the Netherlands. At its peak, Hyves had about 11 million members. Not bad for a country of – nowadays! – 18 million people.

When I joined the company, it was only about 30 people. I experienced its growth to roughly 180 – some of which I’m still happy and grateful to call my friends. We celebrated many milestones with amazing parties.

The technology was interesting too, but even more impressive was the spirit of the team that I was part of, first in the offices at the Herengracht and later at Frederiksplein. Together we were Asterix & Obelix and the entire village of the Galliërs, fighting against the invaders. And for us, the invader took the face of a giant blue monster from across the ocean.

After that, well, I’ll tell you I was pretty fed up with social media. I wasn’t too keen on blue monsters. If it were up to me, I would enact a ban on all social media for anyone under 21, or 23 even. But I’m a pragmatist, so I’d settle for 18.

Not because I hate social media, but because of the responsibilities it creates. In the Hyves days, social media was still innocent. A village square where you’d say hi to your neighbours and your family members before you ducked away into a private group where you discussed dubious music flavours and/or flirted with girls you hardly knew.

These were the days before the cesspits of eternal trolling where everyone tries to mindfuck everyone else all the time from every possible angle. Okay, maybe 25+ is even better.

But alas, it’s not up to me, and these days even I am resigned to being active on social media again. — Good luck trying to market a novel without it in 2026.

Fortunately, I find that if you stick to the right platform, you can keep the toxicity out. You need to be careful whom you trust, but most people out there are not actively trying to screw you over.

Sometimes you run into the blunt ones, the taunting ones, or even the vulgar ones. But even then, showing some respect really does go a long way.

I wish more people would understand the power of Respect. I could even go as far as to say that I’m itching to spread the message. And if you do feel offended, sometimes (often!) it’s best to laugh it away. Because shared laughs create a bond, and happy memories are easier to recall than hard ones.

Which brings me to the last part of this post: Koen Kam was our CTO – and dare I say? my mentor – when I was at Hyves. He taught me the lesson to watch out for the watchmen. But the lesson I taught myself is that as long as you have a dream team, you don’t need to worry about the lessons too much.

Here’s to the three musketeers wearing pink robes & cheers to the folks back at Hyves! 😘