The Eye of the Storm🇬🇧🇳🇱

Dear friends,

It’s only been a few weeks since my last post. But geologically those few weeks have felt like eons. This may sound like an exaggeration, but recall that it was Lenin who wrote in 1918:

Those who have been keeping tabs on the current political turmoil — and let’s be real, who could not? — are sure to find various ways to draw parallels between this one quote and the current state of affairs. So yeah, we’re experiencing a lot of turbulence right now (#metoo), and it’s taken me a little longer to find the right words in these times, but we’re still here.

So what are the right words for this situation? How do you correctly express yourself when you’re in the middle of the storm?

Fuck if I know.

But hey, I didn’t start a blog titled the Philosophy of Balance, because I wanted an easy way out. Sometimes you have to accept there is no easy way out.

And yet, we hang in there. We allow ourselves to be taken for a ride, we put up a smile, and we ride it hard and fast until we reach a place of calmness again. Sometimes, you fake it till you make it.

When I was still an employee at a small company, I used to say I didn’t want to be in management. Why not? I was good at being an individual contributor, and I wanted to lead by example, instead of telling others what to do. In a sense, this is reflected in this blog. I open up my philosophy so that others can look at it. Some may judge me for it, while others will see it as inspiration. But either way, I will lead by example.

And that comes with a heavy burden. Because every time I fail at being a good example, I need to explain myself. I may have been able to avoid management positions previously, but as a parent the gravity of trying to be a good example takes on a weight of its own.

A CEO can say, “fuck these employees,” and unfortunately many do. But well, CEOs are fucking losers compared to anyone who tries to be a good parent. The only exception then goes to those that try to be good, honest CEOs in addition to being good parents. Hats off for those fuckers, because they might have mastered the act of balance than I have.

You see, being a balancist comes with a price. You become a constant mediator between opposing forces. If you’re not careful, that price is paid in the currency of your sanity (been there, done that). That’s why I wrote that you don’t always need to make the right choice. And that’s why I’m using a little more foul language than usual in this post. Sometimes we just need to vent.

These days, I find myself in the eye of the storm.

But not only because there is a war out there.

For many years, I have been trying to become a novelist. I self-published my first novel in 2020, and the second one is about to be released in April. Of course I put in quite some effort, but still I find myself sometimes overwhelmed by doors being opened that I did not anticipate. The world is a mess out there, and here I am finding new paths to success. How do you balance that?

I do believe that success may come both accidentally as well as intentionally. And here I am, feeling that right now, it comes in equal amounts of intent as well as accident. An act of balance, or the eye of yet another storm?

And how can I lead, if I don’t know the answer to these questions?

I keep my back straight, my head up high, and I stick to my own Core Values of the Balanced Mind:

• You must respect every human being as you respect yourself.
• You must strive to keep a balanced mind so that you can judge fairly and act without haste.
• You must strive to maintain a balanced moral compass that you can articulate to others.

But yes, I too make mistakes. And when I struggle to choose between values or priorities, I try to pause and pray. Pray that I pick the right one. And when I don’t, well, I sometimes need to vent.

I hope you stay safe.

Love, Arend.